It’s Been a While
Hard to believe it’s been almost two years since I made a post on this website. Seems like forever ago, and even more of a forever ago. Time in Pandemic land is funny.
Today has been pretty good. Met a good friend for coffee. Hung out with some amazing creative folks on a Zoom. Got a nap because I needed one. Woke up too early for how late I was out last night largely in part by the children playing with balls in the greenbelt outside my window. I could hear the impact of the balls on the tarmac, over and over and… over…
I couldn’t be mad about it, despite less than five hours of sleep. I got wrapped up in the joy of bouncing balls and laughter and just lay there being in that joyful moment by proxy. If the last two years have shown anything, it’s that we need to celebrate joy when and where we find it.
This isn’t one of those toxic-positivity posts about how “outlook” is everything. Sometimes shit is going to piss you off or get you down, no matter how hard you try to spin it in your head. Sometimes things stink. However, the last two years have conditioned us into this vicious cycle of perpetual suckage, and sometimes we gotta find little joys in odd places. We need to pay attention so we can find some bits of beauty in the shitstorm that’s whirlwinding around us and turning our lives inside out over and over and… over…
For most of my adolescence and adult life, I reveled in outrage and negativity. I have a feeling that’s largely due to some aspects of my BPD. But I also liked feeling like a rebellious badass. Only now… It seems like finding beauty and kindness in the current state of the world is the most rebellious act of badassery possible.
So, here’s to our next arbitrary trip around the sun being filled with moments of joy and beauty.
Here’s some of my best of 2020-2021
Best Show: Arcane on Netflix
Honorable Mentions: The Mandolorian, Sense 8, Lovecraft Country, Watchmen
Best Movie: Ghostbusters: Afterlife
Honorable Mentions: The Eternals, Don’t Look Up, Dune
Best Book: This is How you Lose the Time War
Honorable Mentions: Missing You Metropolis, The Bone Shard Daughter, Gideon the 9th, Collected poems of Lucielle Clifton
Random Moments of Beauty:
Falling in love. The poetry I wrote falling in love. And the poetry I wrote to process the heartbreak.
Watching Miss Megan slay boxes with swords on recycling days.
Nerding out about poetry on my livestream with Steven Erikson.
Having Patricia Smith tell me she wished she had ended one of her poems the way I ended one of mine.
CM Punk returning to wrestling.
The wonderful community of the Gallowglas Army.
Finally being able to do shield rounds in Hapkido.
Being Miss Megan’s favorite author
That one thing I can’t talk about because of a promise I made.
Magz
What are some of the beautiful moments from your 2020-2021?
